Pay attention to these things, and maybe make an effort in seeing what parts of yourself would find the proposed experience attractive. Is your body or mind “turned on” by what they want? Are you not “ready” while your partner is? Do you internally feel no resonance and are plainly “not interested” in what they want? If your partner is the one coming up to you and telling you what they want out of this experience and where this need is coming from, based on their inner emotional landscape, pay attention to your own body and mind’s instinctive response to their request.
There may be cultural differences in the kink community between where she lives and those who live in the United States.
In this post, we’re going over some BDSM negotiation basics and tips.